


Not Broken

by Snarry2001



Category: Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Aromantic Tony Stark, Aromantic!Tony, Asexual Character, Asexual Tony, Asexual Tony Stark, Asexual!Tony, Background OC's - Freeform, Bisexual Steve Rogers, Depression, F/M, Gen, Internalized Acephobia, Irondad, M/M, Pride Parades, References to Depression, References to Sex, Sex Repulsion, Sex repulsed asexual, Sexuality Crisis, aromantic Tony
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-29
Updated: 2020-03-29
Packaged: 2021-02-23 00:02:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23369164
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Snarry2001/pseuds/Snarry2001
Summary: Growing up things were always expected of the great Tony Stark, some came to him as easy as breathing, his IQ far surpassed his own fathers by the tender age of eleven... However some of the expectations put on Tonys shoulders took practice, the performances he puts on for the press came from the harsh lessons of a firm handed father, and the cold gaze of an uninterested mother. There was however one thing in Tony's life that he lived up to expectations for, but at a very real cost to himself.When Tony goes with the avengers to a pride parade he finds out more about himself than he ever expected to. Can Tony Stark finally achieve peace, and how will this affect his life? Can Tony muster the strength to finally accept himself as he is?Follows an Asexual Tony Stark, who eventually finds he may be Aromantic as well.
Relationships: Pepper Potts & Tony Stark, Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Peter Parker & Tony Stark, Steve Rogers & Tony Stark, Tony Stark & Avengers Team, Tony Stark/Original Female Character(s) (past), Tony Stark/Original Male Character(s) (past)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 42





	1. Intro

**Author's Note:**

> This will be my first ever fic, and really my first bit of creative writing in over 10 years... so we will see how this turns out! This will be a WIP, and will have chapters to come.

Not Broken

* * *

Growing up things were always expected of the great Tony Stark, some came to him as easy as breathing, his IQ far surpassed his own fathers by the tender age of eleven... However some of the expectations put on Tonys shoulders took practice, the performances he puts on for the press came from the harsh lessons of a firm handed father, and the cold gaze of an uninterested mother. There was however one thing in Tony's life that he lived up to expectations for, but at a very real cost to himself.

Tony could put it off for a while, what everyone seemed to want from him. You see from a young age Tony Stark knew there was something 'off' about himself, where other children his age had schoolyard crushes, Tony wanted to take apart the microwave in the teachers lounge. Howard put up with this for a time, it was almost preferable for the Stark name to show in a small child so obsessed with any technology he could grasp between those tiny fingers, however as Tony got older the clock started ticking... Everyone knew that Stark men where flirts, playboys, and extremely unapologetic about it, and Tony didn't seem to be following this curve.

At age fifteen, right after his high school graduation, Tony got 'The Talk' from Howard, pulling Tony into his study glass of scotch in hand, leading him over to a wingback armchair, Howard stated "Listen, as you get older things will change Tony, girls will be after you left and right", taking a long pull from the glass before sitting down behind a dark and solid wood desk, "and its fine for you to have...  _ relations _ with these girls, to take advantage of the pull that your name and wealth will have on young female minds. What you can Never,  **_Never_ ** do is allow one of those women to claim they have  _ your  _ child. It would ruin the family name Tony," he stated with a cruel gray tint to his eyes before downing the remains of the amber liquid, standing up and finishing with a final almost threatening tone, "we just can't have a disappointment like that ruin all that  **_I_ ** have built, right boy?" squeezing Tony's shoulder with a tight unrelenting grip, chuckling, and walking out of the study. Young Tony sagging into the chair with a sigh, before following his father out of the study. 

* * *

College was... different. Tabloids paid top dollar for any interview a girl on campus would give on what a 'sexual deviant' the Stark boy was. Girls made up stories of long nights spent under the covers, twenty person orgies thrown in a high dollar hotel, anything they made up the press ate up. The stories were written as if they were fact, not some sick fantasy a twenty year old woman came up with about the sixteen year old boy. Tony hated those papers, those girls who would make up such outlandish claims about him, leaving him ill after reading them... he would  _ never _ do these things! Hell, Tony chuckled while reading through one of the more tame articles while thinking to himself, he had never met half of these women! Let alone had them in his bed! Tony just wasn't interested in ' _ that',  _ sex hardly crossed his mind, and when it did it was theoretical and even made him cringe to ponder _...  _ ripping up the offending papers Tony pulled himself together, and with a small, cracking, shaking voice huffed "Stark men are made of iron", brushed himself off, and went to get dressed for bed. Brushing his teeth in the mirror telling himself this would all blow over, it had to... no one would really believe this stuff, would they?

However when coming home to Stark Mansion that year for Thanksgiving Tony was shocked to find something he had never experienced before, a  _ proud _ Howard stark. It turns out Howard was proud of Tony not for what he accomplished in school, no. Howard was proud of those absolute vile stories the tabloids printed. That night listening to Howard stark go off about how his son was "finally a man" and "following in his old man's footsteps", a part of Tony broke just slightly... knowing that this  **_THIS_ ** was what made his father proud. Not Tonys hard work, not his intelligence, but some cheep stories about sex he had with the women at MIT. So that night while drinking his father's stash of expensive liquor Tony sobbed. Cursing those women under his breath as he released what this meant for him... Howard was finally proud of something he 'did', Tony knew he couldn't lose this opportunity, this connection that his father thought they shared, and with that a sixteen year old Tony made up his mind. If this is what everyone wanted from him... then that's what he had to do. He would become the playboy they all so desperately wanted him to be.... No matter what Tony himself thought of the acts, it's what he had to do, right?


	2. A Party, and an Epiphany?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A look into what Tony goes through at parties, as well as a possible Epiphany he has on why he isn't enjoying things the way everyone else seems to.

A Party, and an Epiphany?

As time flew by at MIT Tony played into the rumors surrounding him. At parties Tony would throw on a signature Stark smile, down as much liquor as he could find and copy the actions of all the ‘typical’ men, trying to get into a girl's pants. The mindless falsified flirting wasn't bad, after all he was used to putting on a fake and charming mask at his mother's galas, and this wasn't all that different. What Turned Tony’s stomach was the intimacy. The delicate fingers trailing along his neck, behind his ear, on his upper thigh… He smiled and kept the mask on, but he could never seem to push down the growing anxiety, nausea, and out and out fear that these simple gestures induced in the very pit of his soul. Nevertheless, Tony would keep that blinding smile on his face, and flirt back with the women. After all, he had sex and flirtation down to a science by now. In his need to understand what he was doing wrong Tony studied every couple he could find, every person on a dance floor that seemed to lure the surrounding people closer, how simply putting a hand in the correct place on a woman's back seemed to lead to something more. Science after all was something he understood the laws by which all beings lived by, this couldn't be much different, right?

At a party the first weekend back from summer break everyone turned their heads to get a glimpse of Tony. Driving up, glasses on his face, women already dangling off of his arms, the absolute picture of sex appeal, flashy car, flashy clothing, and women flocking anywhere he went. Exactly the image he cultivated those four long years. Tony parked the red hotrod and jumped out. Going up to the table with all the booze and starting his party 'routine’. Tony felt dead, absolutely and completely dead. He didn’t want to be here, didn't want to do this. With a quiet sigh, straightening his shoulders and chanting in his head, “you can do this, you know what to do, just go through the motions.”, grabbing a bottle of vodka Tony turned around to face the party yelling “let's get this shit started!”, guzzling mouthfuls of the cheap vodka, and dancing to the music playing Tony started his act for the night.

As it was always easier to go through with these things if he was so drunk off his ass Tony guzzled booze like there was no tomorrow at the party before picking one of the more ‘attractive’ women there to flirt with when in reality, Tony had no fucking clue what woman looked ‘sexy’, aesthetically pleasing? Sure. Attractive? He had no clue what that was even supposed to mean. I mean come on, everyone had such different opinions on what made people ‘sexy’ that there was no real way to know for sure what the real definition of a ‘sexy woman’ really was! So, Tony would drink and dance in the earlier hours of the night, watching what girl was getting the most attention from the men, before going in with perfected charm, flirting with the girl, and on most nights, taking her to the closest bed for a night of ‘fun’.

That night the girl who all the guys seemed to think was one hot mamma was a tall brunet, thin but moderately heavy chested, a big smile on her straight teeth with plump peach lips mouthing the words to every song. With one last swig of liquid courage, tony walked up to the brunet, danced by her, singing along to all the songs, ‘flirting’ with her for a while before placing his calloused hand on her lower back, and asking in her ear “How about you and I ditch this popsicle stand, huh?”. Really, all Tony hoped for was a swift slap to the face, or a harsh no… but like usual the girl smiled, grabbed his hand and said “follow me, I know a place.” with a sultry look, pulling Tony to a room in the house while others cat called, and howled behind them. Turning back to the men howling behind them Tony gave a wink and a thumbs up before turning completely and following his woman of the night… dread sinking the pit of his stomach. Sex with women was always the same, and that night wasn't any different. The sex was hot, sticky, and repulsive. Hating every moment, just praying for a swift end, Tony played his part. Touching all the pleasure points he knew of, getting the angles right… anything to make the experience go faster. Whispering dirty nonsense into the girls ears, pushing through the experience until it's… sticky… end.

Getting up with the excuse of “need to take a piss” Tony stumbled his way to the closest bathroom, and vomited. Allowing himself a few minutes of being true to who he really is, Tony fell down crying silent tears, wondering what the fuck he couldn't just be normal. What sort of man was he if he didn’t enjoy sex with the ‘most attractive’ woman at the party? After the few quick moments he allowed himself to actually feel, Tony got op, rinsing out his mouth and splashing the tear marks off of his face before walking out of the bathroom, and leaving the party for the night, cursing every part of himself that caused him to be such a fucking freak that he didn’t enjoy sex.

* * *

In his senior year Tony had a wild thought pop into his head one night while working in one of the student labs, what if he didn’t like sex because he was gay? If her was gay it would make sense that he didn’t like pulling women into his bed, it would just mean he needed to switch things up a bit. And sure, Howard might get mad, the media might have a field day at the “Gay Stark Boy” but so what! If it meant he could actually feel what others did when they fucked, wouldn’t it be worth it? It’s not like he hadn't felt the harsh words of the tabloids come after him already, and anyways fuck them, he deserved to be happy, to experience actually wanting to be with someone, and if he got that feeling with men, then fuck, he was going to go for it. 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, this is my first ever attempt at writing a Fanfic, so if there is anything you think I should work on, or any Tips you have, let me know bellow in the comments! Once we get into the main storyline of an older Tony the chapters will start to get longer.  
> Hope you enjoyed!


End file.
